Kickboxer: Retaliation

What does the rebooted Kickboxer franchise need to spice things up? Maybe a little Zatoichi? Alas, Master Durand will be blinded by the newest villain, but it hardly matters. He equally skilled when relying on his other four senses. The question will be whether he can train his pseudo-protégé Kurt Sloane to be just as adept at sensing and anticipating an opponent’s moves when he faces his next behemoth rival. The stakes are higher, but Durand is just as Zen in Dimitri Logothetis’s Kickboxer: Retaliation (trailer here), which opens tomorrow in New York.

Previously, in Kickboxer: Vengeance, Tong Po killed Sloane’s brother and then Sloane killed him, fair and square, in an underground steel cage fight. That is just how the rules work in Thailand. Sloane went home, bringing Liu, Bangkok’s only honest cop with him. Eighteen months later, shadowy gangster and underground fight promoter Thomas Tang More has him abducted and incarcerated in the pretext of facing charges for Tong Po’s murder. Of course, he really just wants Sloane to defend his title against Mongkok, an Icelandic mountain of steroids.

Initially, Sloane continues to defy More, but he relents when Liu is also kidnapped. Fortunately, the newly blind Durand is available to train him (he has been blind ten minutes, but he is already like Hundred Eyes in Marco Polo). Sloane will also get tutorials from fellow prisoners, including Briggs, an American boxer with a familiar looking facial tattoo. Mongkok is juiced to the max, but he has a glass jaw, so let the fun begin.

Alain Moussi is not exactly household name yet, but he rock-solidly anchors the rebooted franchise. He has plenty of chops and more than sufficient screen charisma. You could almost think of him as the next Michael Dudikoff. Naturally, Jean-Claude Van Damme is ultra-cool and super-limber as Durand. Sara Malakul Lane’s Liu doesn’t get to be as proactive this time around, but she continues to develop some believable chemistry with Moussi.

Perhaps most importantly, Iron Mike Tyson looks like he is having a blast as Briggs, which was surely a relief to Logothetis. As you would expect, Christopher Lambert chews the scenery with villainous panache as More. Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson looks impossibly big as Mongkok, which makes you wonder who they could possibly get that would be any huger for the promised third film. Plus, for extra added authenticity, about a dozen real-life MMA fighters play themselves or slightly fictionalized analogues.

Logothetis, who co-wrote and co-produced Vengeance, gives action fans cleanly legible fight scenes. Retaliation is twenty minutes lengthier, which is on the longish side for this genre, but Logothetis keeps the pacing peppy. So maybe it is meatheaded, but it is definitely entertaining. Easily recommended for fans of martial arts cinema and Van Damme, Kickboxer: Retaliation opens tomorrow (1/26) in New York, at the AMC Empire.

Halloween Pussy Trap Kill! Kill!: Worse Than 31

They are like the meta women hardcore glam punk equivalent of the Monkees, except they will not be around for long. The band Kill Pussy Kill (played by indie scream queens, but credited with at least one song on the soundtrack album) is about to be kidnapped and taught a less in sacrifice by a Jigsaw like “Mastermind” in Jared Cohn’s Halloween Pussy Trap Kill! Kill! (trailer here), which opens today in Los Angeles.

Oddly enough, given the lurid echoes of the title, Kill! Kill! does not proudly fly its Russ Meyer influences. You could maybe force some parallels, but in Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!, it is the women who are the abductors, whereas in HPTKK, they are the abducted. Kill Pussy Kill were on their way to a career-making gig, when a creepy gas station hick with the name Dale stitched above his pocket kidnaps the women, so they can serve as pawns in the wheelchair bound freak’s game of life and death. Before they can advance to each new room (and supposedly closer to freedom), one band member must die.

Based on the prologue, we are given good reason to believe the sadistic psycho is actually a former Special Forces veteran, who had his face cut off by Jihadists. Basically, that means Cohn rips off Rob Zombie’s 31 and Raze, but adds character assassination of American military service personnel as an extra added bonus. HPTKK even takes place on Halloween night just like 31, but Zombie’s film, featuring the gothic warehouse setting and the Eighteenth-Century costumes donned by the sicko audience, is more ambitious and distinctive looking. Frankly, I never thought I would use the words “ambitious” and “distinctive” to describe the soullessly violent 31, but here we are, thanks to HPTKK.

None of the bandmembers has much personality, not even their leader, Amber Stardust, played by Sara Malakul Lane, who has to start turning down some of her fiancée’s projects and get back to making terrific genre films like Sun Choke and Beyond the Gates. Problematically, the most sharply delineated and proactive character is former bandmember DJ Speed, who we first meet while attempting to force himself on another bandmember. Still, it is pretty mind-blowing that Richard Grieco, from the original 21 Jump Street, plays gristly, knuckle-dragging Dale. To his credit, he certainly chews the scenery.

Yeah, not good. This a brutal but derivative film that has no reason for being, except to sell a soundtrack album. Not recommended under any circumstances, Halloween Pussy Trap Kill! Kill! opens today (10/27) in Los Angeles, at the Arena Cinema.

Death Pool: The San Fernando Valley’s Home-Grown Serial Killer

Due to a childhood trauma, Johnny Taylor has an aversion to all water, except bong-water. Unfortunately, he is about to have a breakthrough. Instead of fearing the water, it will bring out the latent woman-hating serial killer inside him in Jared Cohn’s Death Pool (trailer here), which releases today on DVD from MTI Home Video.

As a boy, Johnny Taylor (not to be confused with the vastly more talented Stax soul singer Johnnie Taylor) was nearly drowned for sport on several occasions by his pretty baby sitter. The experiences scarred him in ways the twentynothing has never recovered from. Living on handouts from his guilt-ridden parents, the porn actor washout accepts a part-time pool cleaning gig with his running mate Brandon. Returning with the intention of hooking up with a client, Taylor drowns her instead. Voila, water phobia gone. Of course, this process will repeat in numerous, unlikely ways.

Based on Death Pool, it is easy to see why so many San Fernando Valley residents wanted to secede from Los Angeles. Taylor’s killings are reckless, impulsive acts, during which time he takes absolutely no precautions to minimize physical evidence. Frankly, the LAPD is ridiculously tardy identifying him as the killer.

However, we get plenty of drug fueled porn parties to stoke Taylor’s predatory rage. There is no question Death Pool must be the most misogynistic horror film in many a moon. It also looks cheap and grubby. Heck, you would probably find better production values on a San Fernando porn shoot.

Therefore, it is rather sad to see emerging genre star Sara Malakul Lane (Sun Choke, Kickboxer: Vengeance, as well as half a dozen previous Cohn films) appearing in Death Pool as Scarlet, the ex who broke Taylor’s black heart. At least she lends a bit of professionalism to the otherwise depressing affair. Randy Wayne isn’t exactly a riveting presence as Taylor, but he seems to be enjoying himself to a problematic degree.

Cohn tries to throw in some eleventh-hour commentary regarding society’s vapid obsession with celebrities and serial killers, openly conflating the two, but it is too little, too late. What’s the deal with Cohn, anyway? The Horde was a fan-pleasing slice of B-Movie payback action that was followed by the lurid but somewhat distinctive Devil’s Domain. In contrast, Death Pool is just an ugly film in every way. Perhaps he should slow down his output three or four films a year? Regardless, Death Pool should be avoided now that it is available on DVD and VOD, from MTI Home Video.

Beyond the Gates: 1980s VHS Horror Love

This retro 1980s horror film just might make you nostalgic for a short-lived category of games you probably never played. Remember VCR board games? Probably only vaguely from seeing them on the shelves. It turns out you were right not to play, but two bickering brothers will have to learn that the hard way in Jackson Stewart’s Beyond the Gates (trailer here), which opens this Friday in New York.

It has been months since the disappearance of Gordon and John Hardesty’s binge-drinking father, so they are finally facing the inevitable and closing down his anachronistic video store. This is a bad time for Gordon to return to his home town, because he is still working out issues that very nearly severed his relationship with the slightly out-of-his-league Margot Jones. In contrast, the couch-surfing John never left—and he sure seems to have plenty of time. While cleaning out the office, they come across a strange looking VCR board game called Beyond the Gates. Naturally, they are going to try playing it. In retrospect, this looks like a bad idea—one their father made before them.

Evelyn, the bossy Elvira-like hostess seems to be talking directly to them, especially when she offers them an opportunity to save the old man’s soul. All they have to do is collect the game’s four keys, but to do so they will have to complete four comically gory tasks. Eventually, they will also to journey through the spooky graveyard-style gates that suddenly sprung up in the basement, because that is literally the name of the game.

Gates is just gleefully entertaining for genre fans, both for its VHS nostalgia and the casting of nearly a dozen contemporary horror movie regulars in featured and supporting roles. Chase Williamson (John Dies at the End, SiREN) does some of his most engaging work yet as the irresponsible Hardesty brother. Likewise, Graham Skipper (Mind’s Eye, Almost Human) finally gets to play it straight and normal (and rather engagingly so) as the Hardesty with a girlfriend. Brea Grant (Best Friends Forever) dos as well as could be expected as the understanding Jones. Justin Welborn (Southbound, V/H/S Viral) and Sara Malakul Lane (Sun Choke) add further color and energy as John Hardesty’s erratic drifter friend Hank and his put-upon girlfriend Dahlia.

However, it is Barbara Crampton (Re-Animator, From Beyond) who really makes the movie as the appropriately vampy Evelyn. She chews the scenery and looks the part—in spades. Even though she has been a genre cult favorite since the eighties, it isn’t so creepy when the younger Hardesty bro starts going on about her hotness. Seriously, its not, right?

Throughout Gates, the effects always look vintage eighties straight-to-video, but in the right way. Far from feeling cheap, the film is really a triumph of cleverly detailed production design. Stewart and co-screenwriter Stephen Scarlata infuse the proceedings with sly attitude, but they never let winks and hat-tips distract from the fundamental genre movie business. Jolly good fun, Beyond the Gates is enthusiastically recommended for horror movie lovers when it opens this Friday (12/9) in New York, at the IFC Center.

Kickboxer: Vengeance—Van Damme Reboots His Own Franchise

Evidently, underground cage fighting is the national sport of Thailand. That makes Tong Po, the reigning cage champion a national hero. Kurt Sloane cannot let it stand when the brutal wall of muscle kills his Olympic Champion brother Eric in the [illegal] ring, but the corrupt cops will never bring Tong Po to justice. Sloane will have to take it to him instead in John Stockwell’s Kickboxer: Vengeance (trailer here), which opens this Friday in New York.

If this set-up sounds familiar, you most likely remember the original fan-favorite Kickboxer from 1989. However, Jean-Claude Van Damme no longer plays the vengeance seeking Kurt Sloane. He is now Durand, the expat Muay Thai master, who trained Eric for his tragic bout. Admittedly, that should not inspire a heck of a lot of confidence, but the surviving Sloane sibling still turns to Durand as he prepares to take on Tong Po. Sloane also develops a romantic relationship with Liu, the only honest cop in Bangkok, who saves his bacon on a number of occasions.

Based on previous Kickboxer films, we would expect everything will eventually be settled in a climatic cage match. Stockwell runs true to form in that respect, but he still keeps things snappy. The big fight is a dozy, but there are also winking hat-tips for fans of the original to pick up on sprinkled throughout.

Fifty-five-year-old JCVD still looks massively cut, but he sort of acts his age this time around. In fact, Durand the snarky Zen master is a perfect fit for his quirky persona. Canadian stunt performer Alain Moussi has the appropriate physicality for Sloane, but his screen presence is somewhat pedestrian. In contrast, Dave Bautista has the presence of King Kong as Tong Po.

Among the who’s-who-of-MMA supporting cast, Georges St-Pierre scores the biggest laughs and flashes his chops in a few appealingly energetic fight scenes. Bafflingly, Gina Carano is completely wasted as Eric Sloane’s crooked fight promoter. However, the Thai-fluent Sara Malakul Lane continues to show tremendous poise and movie star potential as Liu. Yet, many martial arts fans will most remember the late Darren Shahlavi’s appearances as the ill-fated Eric Sloane. Probably best known as Twister in Ip Man 2, he had the skills and the intensity to be the next Scott Adkins, but sadly fate would not allow it.

It is not called Kickboxer: Vengeance for nothing. Even if you are unfamiliar with the previous films, the title really ought to tell you everything you need to know. Stockwell’s unfussy, adrenaline and testosterone-charged approach delivers some highly cinematic beatdowns. Highly recommended for martial arts fans (but somewhat less so for discerning cineastes), Kickboxer: Vengeance opens this Friday (9/2) in select theaters and on VOD platforms.

Sun Choke: California Crazy

Holistic-organic medicine is not enough for a tough case like the mysterious Janie. She really requires hardcore anti-psychotic drugs. It is not like she has much of a personality to water-down. Unfortunately, her minder prefers more Californian treatments. The electrified dog collar is maybe not such a bad idea, but it comes as too little, too late in Ben Cresciman’s weirdly intimate horror film Sun Choke (trailer here), which opens today in Los Angeles.

Evidently, Janie has had “incidents” in the past, but Cresciman plays it coy with respects to the details, as he does with all backstory in general. Apparently, Janie has been under the care of Irma, a longtime family servant (perhaps a former nurse or nanny) for several years, because her father, who always seems to be abroad on business, has essentially given up on her. Believing the yoga is finally yielding positive results, Irma decides to reward Janie with some unsupervised time outside of the house.

Unfortunately, Janie immediately develops a psychotic fixation on Savannah, an underemployed actress with an active love life. Soon she is stalking the young woman, breaking into her apartment, and violently targeting her latest lover. Sensing Janie’s relapse, Irma unleashes a severe battery of behavior modifying treatments, but her charge is too far gone.

Sun Choke is a deliberately discomfiting film in the Polanski tradition. Much of it is deceptively quiet and stiflingly closely observed, but there is always a palpable threat of violence following Janie like her shadow. It mostly works, thanks in large measure to its terrific primary trio.

1980s “scream queen” Barbara Crampton demonstrates why she is busy as ever these days, with her complex, scary but not completely unsympathetic turn as Irma. Sara Malakul Lane is poised to become a scream queen successor for the 2010s, following up genre-friendly work in Pernicious and Shortwave with her grounded and sympathetically vulnerable portrayal of Savanah. In the showcase role, Sarah Hagen’s Janie is so utterly squirrely, she unnerves the audience whenever she is on-screen.

Choke is a hard film to love, but genre fans will immediately respect Cresciman’s vision and his command of mood and mise-en-scene. He maintains a tight focus not so far removed from the one-set, limited-character stage thriller, a la Death Trap or Wait Until Dark, except Choke is more ambiguous in all respects. Intriguing, somewhat demanding, but rewarding for the bold and broad-minded, Sun Choke opens today (8/5) in Los Angeles, at the Arena Cinema.