I Am Raquel Welch, on CW

Hammer Films made her a super-star, but not in a horror movie. She broke out in a big way in a silly prehistoric epic, thanks to her cave-woman bikini. She immediately became an international celebrity and pin-up poster queen. Yet, the films she made at the height of her fame were of inconsistent quality, for reasons beyond her control. Whether they were fans or not, viewers should feel fresh new respect watching Olivia Cheng’s I Am Raquel Welch, which premieres Saturday on CW.

Everyone knew Welch had a bombshell figure. Even if they hadn’t seen One Million Years B.C., they knew the posters. Unfortunately, she still had to sit through ogling interview from talk show hosts acting like horny teen boys. However, the same guest they were drooling over was already a single mother when she arrived in Hollywood.

Cheng and company do an okay job covering Welch’s most notable films, including B.C., 100 Rifles (wherein she shared an interracial kiss with James Brown), Kansas City Bomber (which she also produced, before producing was the norm for big stars), and The Three Musketeers, for which she won a Golden Globe. Unfortunately, they gloss over her early but substantial role in Fantastic Voyage, which is still a really cool sf film and Bluebeard (the closest she got to the horror genre).

Ironically, some of the best analysis focuses on a film Welch never appeared in. When MGM fired her from Cannery Row, despite her legally binding contract, she sued for breach and on age-discrimination grounds, winning a legal victory that would become an important precedent. (The truth is, all those big business villains Hollywood like to portray are really just the studios and stars projecting their own questionable ethics and practices onto more reputable industries.)

Indeed, Hollywood studios did not do Welch a lot of favors. She was one of the last big stars who was still signed to an old-fashioned studio contract when her fame initially exploded. Unfortunately, that meant she made a lot of films that were better for the studio than her long-term career.

Good Cop/Bad Cop, on CW

Police work is the Hickmans’ family business, but you will never confuse them with the Reagans of Blue Bloods. To be fair, Det. Lou Hickman has potential, but her small town police chief father, Big Hank Hickman prefers to keep Eden Vale’s crime statistics down through jurisdictional gameplay. Her brother, Det. Henry Hickman, does not approve, but even Sheldon Cooper would find him socially awkward. Regardless, they have plenty of light comedic procedural work ahead in creator John Quaintance’s Good Cop/Bad Cop, which premieres Wednesday on CW.

Lou Hickman needs better forensic support. Instead, Chief Big Hank hires a second detective, her brother Henry, whose blunt honesty and weird pedantry consistently sabotaged his career with the Seattle police. Big Hank hopes to repair his relationship with little Henry, but it will take time and effort. At least the odd couple siblings resent their absent mother more than their camera-chasing father.

They also have a high-profile case to solve during the pilot, “Peace in the Valley.” In an ironic twist of fate, an armed robber shot another masked bandit who was already holding up the drug store he intended to rob. Somehow, the Hickman detectives hold onto the case long enough to clear it, instead of turning it over to the better funded sheriff’s department. Det. Lou would resent them, but she enjoys flirting with Deputy Shane Carson too much.

The next episode, “The King’s Assassin” (written by Quiantance), earns points for topicality when one of three crypto bros ends up dead during their legally supervised mushroom bender. This case takes a clever twist, while introducing the ex-girlfriend Li’l Henry left behind.

The Hickman detectives are reminded why he hated high school and she loved it when they investigate death threats sent to the star varsity quarterback in “Mr. Popular,” written by Steve Joe. It also sets up the mystery based on the newly unearthed human bones of a victim murdered many years prior, which critics cannot spoil even if they wanted to, because it does not advance very far in the six episodes provided for review. However, it might be the closest to Twin Peaks that Good Cop/Bad Cops gets thus far, even though the woodsy Washington State setting immediately brings the David Lynch classic to mind.

“Found Footage” (written by Julia de Fina) might sound like it should appeal to horror fans, when the star of a would-be YouTube horror movie disappears during the shoot, but director Corrie Chen never really goes for scares. However, the episodes gives journalistic ethics (or the lack thereof) a reasonably good skewering.

Episode six has the potential to get very dark, figuratively and literally, when a Bonnie-and-Clyde-like criminal couple successfully blow-up both the local power sub-station and cell-tower, but there will be no mass destruction in Eden Vale, at least not until the season finale (not yet available for review). However, it fully embraces its Washington Stateness when the Hickmans also investigate the theft of a specially developed apple tree.

Wild Cards, Season Two, on CW

Maybe it takes a thief to catch a thief, but you still need a cop to make the arrest. Basically, that is the principle behind the partnership of supposedly “reformed” con artiste Max Mitchell and Det. Cole Ellis, who recently had his detective shield fully restored, thanks to the cases they cleared. Much to his outward chagrin (and maybe secret satisfaction), the commissioner wants them to continue working together. For every case she works, Mitchell knocks two weeks off her criminal mastermind father’s prison sentence. That might not sound like much, but they have another full season ahead of them to chip away when season two of creator Micheal Konyves’s Wild Cards premieres this Wednesday on CW.

The whole plan throughout season one was for Mitchell to use her police access to ultimately switch out a fake for a Faberge Egg and leave Ellis looking like a fool. However, she uncovered evidence regarding the murder of Ellis’s brother, so she canceled her getaway. Instead, she delivers the flash-drive recordings to Ellis and swaps back jeweled egg before anyone notices—anyone else than Ellis, that is. Consequently, the detective has serious trust issues during the rest of the season opener, “Con in 60 Seconds.”

Of course, this episode also demonstrates why they are so well-paired. In “60 Seconds,” clearly more inspired by Fast & Furious than Gone in 60 Seconds, Mitchell and Ellis go undercover to bust a gang of street-racing thieves. It turns out she can handle the wheel, having fled her share of crime scenes, while he knows his way around an engine. In most ways, it is an average odd couple undercover procedural, but it sets up several of the continuing storylines for the season. It is also a good example of the grounded credibility Terry Chen brings to the series as eternally patient, but exasperated Chief Li.

The season’s second episode, “Once a Con a Time in the West,” features one of the most notable guest-stars of any show airing this month. Original Brat Pack member Ally Sheedy appears as ranching matriarch Rose Pruett, whose prize stud horse is targeted by an assassin. Evidently, the Pruetts are under pressure to sell the family farm, so if they lose Paul, the professional equine papa, they lose it all.

Sheedy definitely has a nice Big Valley vibe as Pruett, while writers Konyves and Marcus Robison address the rural country elements (apparently right outside Vancouver) without sounding conspicuously phony. This episode also notably features Martin Sheen in the recurring role of Jonathan Ashford, a legendary con artist, whose video memoir Mitchell watches to bone-up on her sharp practices, but might just lead her question her illegal ways even more.

Superman & Lois: A Regular Guy

In small towns like Smallville, everybody knows everyone else’s business. Maybe they are not the best places for someone with a secret identity to live. Yet, Clark Kent (a.k.a. Superman) has always felt safe there. However, he has had a lot of trouble keeping the cat at least halfway still in the bag at the start of “A Regular Guy,” the latest episode of Superman & Lois, which premieres tonight on CW.

Pretty much everyone in Smallville saw Doomsday dump Superman’s temporarily dead body on the town’s Main Street. Quite a few people also saw Lois and his sons react with the pain and grief of family members. Nevertheless, those glasses sure keep people off the scent.

For a good part of the episode, Kent goes on a geeky wimp tour, trying to make himself look anything but super in front of the most suspicious neighbors. Of course, past super sightings of his sons further complicate his efforts. Things reach a turning point, when the Kents realize Lex Luthor is trying to stir the pot.

This season of Superman & Lois takes the iconic DC character and gives him the vintage Marvel treatment. It is all about Superman’s family relationships and his efforts to find the right superhero life-work balance—after coming back to life. Ultimately, the Kents decide what to do as a family, hashing it out over the kitchen table. Honestly, these kind of scenes are why it is the best family drama currently running on TV or streaming.

“A Regular Guy” is also a great showcase for Tyler Hoechlin, who was largely sidelined during the earlier “death of Superman” episodes (because he was dead). Without question, he is the best Superman since Christopher Reeve as well as those who came before 1978.

Superman & Lois: A Perfectly Good Wedding

Since "The American Way” is now off the table, if there is one thing Superman still represents, it would be hope. There is a lot of hope in this episode, including a wedding—maybe. The thing is nothing has gone to plan in Smallville lately. Yet, things are looking up at the start of “A Perfectly Good Wedding,” this week’s episode of Superman & Lois, which premieres tonight on CW.

As viewers know from the final minutes of “Always My Hero,” the Kents have some very good news in store for them. Wisely, director Gregory Smith and writers Greg Kitson & Max Kronick eschew dialogue for the happy celebration that opens this week’s installment. However, they are keenly aware they are not yet out of the woods. In fact, Luthor still has the upper hand, unless Lane convinces his longtime accomplice Gretchen Kelly to flip on her boss.

While they bide their time, Lane volunteers to host her colleague Chrissy Beppo’s wedding to the reformed Kyle Cushing, believing it is time Smallville had something to celebrate. That does not mean the Kent household is drama free. In fact, for the time being, only Jonathan, the newest “Super” Kent, will be super-hero-ing, and only sparingly so, like a Metropolis mall fire—that predictably turns into something more.

Considering the heavy emotional toll of the first three episodes of the season, “A Perfectly Good Wedding” offers viewers a chance to catch their breath and regroup, while still advancing the storyline. That said, the first five minutes might choke-up die-hard fans.

Superman & Lois, Season Four, on CW

This will be the final season of CW’s last DC superhero series currently on its schedule, but they are going out with a bang. The first three episodes of season four adapt the most famous Superman comic book story arc of all time. Saying what it is outright would violate embargoes. However, any serious fan knew the prospect of battling Doomsday during season three’s cliffhanger ending boded ominously. Dark days are ahead, but the Kent family must band together in the first three episodes of Superman & Lois’s fourth and final season, which premieres tomorrow on the CW (moved up from its previously announced date).

Thanks to a suit and some training from the DOD, Jordan Kent is Superboy, but he remains the same dumb kid. His brother Jon continues to be the more mature one (comparatively speaking). The Kent family needs his stabilizing influence when Lex Luthor declares war on them. Beyond the obvious supervillain reasons, he created Doomsday to take on Superman, to get to Lois Lane, Luthor’s real nemesis. The disgraced mogul still blames the former Daily Planet reporter for his incarceration and his estrangement from his daughter Elizabeth.

Luthor is not too happy with Lois’s father, General Sam Lane, either. In addition to serving as Superman’s handler, he also helped secure protective relocation for Luxor’s daughter. Striking while the iron is hot, Luthor has his thugs kidnap the General. Although the Kents remain in crisis mode, Superboy can focus his super-hearing on finding his grandfather’s location.

At least it gives him something structured to do. When Superboy flies off on his own initiative in the following episode, “A World Without,” it leads to trouble. Frankly, they already have plenty of that. In addition to the embargoed stuff, Smallville Mayor (and Clark Kent’s old sweetheart) Lana Lang Cushing undercovers evidence of Luthorcorp’s plans to buy up considerable parts of the town, presumably for nefarious purposes.

Things look pretty bad in the next episode, “Always My Hero,” so the DOD must call in reinforcements. There is no Justice League in this world (and not much time left to create it), but there are John Henry Irons, a.k.a. Steel (Shaquille O’Neal played a very different version of him in a movie best forgotten) and his daughter (no longer his niece) Nathalie, a.k.a. Starlight, who happens to be Gen. Lane’s granddaughter, in a weird multiversal kind of way. They will see their share of action in an episode rife with tragedy, but driven by hope.

Indeed, these three episodes show why Superman & Lois is better suited to take on this storyline than the live action films. Despite the spandex and superpowers, this show always put family drama front and center. It is about the Kents rather than cosmic spectacle. (That said, the big extended super-slugfest is rendered surprisingly well.) Despite some changes to fit the show’s pre-existing mythology, it really gets to the essence of the classic storyline.

It is also just as much about Smallville as was Smallville. Indeed, Emmanuelle Chriqui supplies some of the most memorable quiet moments as Mayor Cushing, who comes to support her friends, the Kents. However, Michael Kudlitz is definitely the star of these three episodes, as Luthor, who is undeniably on the march. He certainly has the swagger and the snarl for the super-villain.

Dylan Walsh also delivers some standout scenes as Gen. Lane. While his character is imperfectly human (as we see during flashbacks), he is a refreshingly sympathetic military figure. Indeed, the way the series developed his relationships with the Ironses, nicely played by Wole Parks and Taylor Buck, has been quite an intriguing wrinkle. Parks and Buck also deserve credit for rehabilitating the Steel character after the Shaq debacle.

Joan, on CW

The 1980s were an era of upward social mobility, flashy style, and conspicuous consumption. Joan Hannington wanted her piece of the pie, even if she had to steal it—especially if she could steal it. However, previous bad decisions, like her first marriage, keep blocking her attempts to get ahead in creator Anna Symon’s six-episode Joan, which premieres Wednesday on CW.

Joan is a loving mother, but little Kelly’s often-absent father is a lowlife, whose underworld debts endanger them both. Believing she needs money to create the safe, stable family environment her daughter deserves, Joan embarks on a series of desperate crimes. She has mixed success as a lone wolf, but she starts playing in more advanced leagues when she meets dodgy antiques dealer (apparently, that is the only kind you can find in London), Boisie Hannington. He has some big ideas, but they require patience and discipline, both of which Joan has in short supply.

Despite their bickering, Joan falls hard for Boisie and vice versa. She also enjoys the posh clothes and luxurious hotels that his schemes require. Of course, Boisie’s overseas accomplice Albie predicts Joan’s prima donna attitude will lead to trouble, but like everyone else in this series, he cannot walk away from a potentially lucrative score.

As you might be sensing, Joan has a real identity crisis. Symon cannot decide whether she is making a British version of Ocean’s 8 or an EastEnders spin-off. Just when it starts to get into a tantalizing larcenous endeavor, Hannington rushes off for another depressing meeting with social services or her grim family. To further complicate the audience’s response, we watch the future Mrs. Hannington break so many laws and make so many foolishly impulsive decisions, it is hard to root for her during the downbeat scenes of domestic drama.

Frankly, many questionable calls were made throughout the series, including the make-up for lead thesp Sophie Turner (the Dark Phoenix), which is so ghostly pale, you might half-expect the twist-ending from The Sixth Sense. It is a shame, because Turner is quite good expressing all of the title character’s emotional highs and lows. She makes Joan quite a roller coaster.

Walker: See You Sometime (Series Finale)

It is time to ride off into the sunset. Fortunately, there will be no crime in the entire state of Texas while the Rangers wrap-up some final personal and administrative business. It was a tough season for Cordell Walker, so maybe he would be happy to know this will be the last. Frankly, he is lucky to be alive for “See You Sometime,” the series finale of Walker, which premieres tonight on CW.

Apparently, The Jackal had Walker strapped to a gurney and buried alive, so he is still understandably a bit shaky. To his credit, he is finally starting to open with his family and girlfriend, because he cannot pretend this case wasn’t brutal on them too.

Consequently, there will be no crimes solved in this episode. Instead, it is all about character pay-off. The only open question left to resolved is who gets the promotion to lieutenant? The answer is embargoed, but even if it weren’t, it would be no fair telling.

Sight Unseen: Razor’s Edge (Season Finale)

What kind of person gets obsessed with true crime? Perhaps a murderer might take a “professional” interest. Detective-turned-crime-solving consultant Tess Avery is rather disappointed to discover her online visual guide, Sunny Patel, is in fact a fugitive wanted for murder. However, Patel’s agoraphobia is still real. That means if the “real killer” come looking for her, it could mean real trouble in “Razor’s Edge,” the season finale of Sight Unseen, which airs tomorrow on CW.

Honestly, making Patel a murderer would be a movie plot twist. A Canadian network television show is unlikely to play that game with a character viewers have presumably invested nine weeks in already. Nevertheless, Avery is suspicious and understandably ticked off. However, she is also a bit angry with herself for hooking up with her former partner, Jake Campbell, right when she was starting to commit to Matt Alleyne, her childhood friend and long-suffering IT consultant.

To rub Patel’s nose in her deception, Avery forces her to remotely revisit the scene of her alleged crime. However, episode writer Karen Troubetzkoy never seriously invites viewers to suspect Patel’s guilt. Instead, episode director Bruce McDonald (who helmed the mind-bending zombie film, Pontypool) builds towards a clever role reversal climax, wherein Avery and Alleyne try to guide Patel through a crisis, using the tech designed to help the sight-impaired detective.

Walker: The Quiet

There are two things they universally support in Texas: family and crime fighting, even in Austin. That is where the Texas Rangers are headquartered, after all. Nobody is more synonymous with the Rangers than Cordell Walker, first in the Chuck Norris series and now in the CW reboot. Since the original pilot, it looks like the writers better understand how to cater to audiences for those themes, at least judging by “The Quiet,” the fourth and final season premiere of Walker, which premieres Wednesday on the CW.

A lot has happened since at least one of us checked in on Walker, his family, and his colleagues. His team is still reeling from their fruitless pursuit of The Jackal, a serial killer who remains at large. Whoever the perp might be, he went underground at the end of season three. However, Walker and Trey Barnett must suddenly investigate fresh signs of the Jackal, without informing Captain Larry James, who was nearly broken by their powerlessness to stop the soul-crushing murders.

These scenes are considerably better than anything in the pilot, which admittedly, was three years ago. On the other hand, this episode’s self-contained case involves a fentanyl gang, but nobody ever mentions their original supplier: China. That’s kind of gutless.

Sight Unseen, on CW

Just because a detective might be blind doesn’t mean they aren’t observant. Indeed, there is a long tradition of vision-impaired crime-fighters, including Daredevil, Longstreet, Clive Owen in Second Sight, and Andy Lau in Blind Detective. Tess Avery is the latest. Her hereditary Leber’s Neuropathy came on quickly but decisively, forcing her to resign from the police force. Yet, we all know she can never walk away from solving crimes in creators Karen & Nikolijne Troubetzkoy’s Sight Unseen, which premieres Wednesday on the CW.

Avery was so good at her job, she used to make all the other detectives look bad, even including her partner Jake Campbell, who maybe also carried an ambiguously romantic torch for her. However, she abruptly resigns when she is unable to shoot a suspect fleeing with an abduction victim. Even though he nearly died during the incident, Campbell assumes it is a one-time choke, but she knows she finally inherited her late mother’s Leber’s.

She does not deal with it well. Refusing to confide in Campbell, she constantly dodges Mia Moss, her new adaptation “coach,” who is also legally blind. Instead, she relies on Sunny Patel, her video chat guide, much like the one featured in Randall Okita’s horror-thriller, See for Me. Rather conveniently, Patel is an agoraphobe, so she is pretty much always available. She is also a true crime junkie, so she is also willing.

Unfortunately, Campbell’s new partner Leo Li is one of those cops who cares more about his “numbers” than justice, so Avery must constantly supply Campbell with the motivation and ammunition to do the right thing. In the premiere episode, “Tess,” she starts by searching for the still-missing woman. For a change of pace this time, Avery believes the husband is innocent. Given the limited number of supporting characters, that leaves very few alternate suspects.

Of the first three episodes provided for review, the second, “Sunny,” probably serves up the best crime story. Since hit-and-runs are notoriously difficult to solve, Avery returns to one of the final cases she worked before losing her vision. Soon, she suspects it involves the disappearance of a disgraced tech-lifestyle guru, which is definitely the sort of case Det. Li would like to solve. Avery still has trouble leveling with Campbell, even though their on-screen chemistry starts to take on greater definition.

Again, the mystery of the third episode, “Jake,” has a very Quinn Martin-esque lack of mystery, because there are literally only one or maybe two suspects it could be. However, writer Russ Cochrane does a nice job using the search for a John Doe’s identity to tease out elements of Avery’s character. It also introduces her deadbeat brother Lucas, who will obviously get into serious trouble later. We learn more about Patel’s issues, but so far, they do not land as compellingly as Avery’s.

Son of a Critch: Reach for the Top

As a proud geek, Mark Critch has a passion for Star Trek and trivia. He is also interested in two girls who actually talk to him. They all collide when he and his sort-of-ex Fox compete against his current flirt-more-than-girlfriend on a TV quiz show in “Reach for the Top,” the next episode of Son of a Critch, which airs tomorrow on CW.

Critch and Fox are in a just-friends phase, which is still a real step up from when she used to bully him. Somehow, he convinced her to be a member of his trivia team when they represent St. Bridget’s on Reach for the Top, a TV quiz show for kids. Of course, Critch is a know-it-all, but his pseudo-girlfriend Cara, who captains the team from their Protestant rivals is better at handling pressure. She might also have a talent for mind-games.

As Critch crumbles under the studio lights, he imagines what Kirk would do, in a fantasy sequence set on the Enterprise bridge, with him in the captain’s conn. It looks quite true to the original Trek, as Paramount required, when they granted their permission. Conveniently, the production designer for this episode, Mark Steel, has worked as the art or production designer on six Star Trek: Discovery installments.

Frankly, some fans will be disappointed the fantasy segment wraps up so quickly, because of Steel’s eye for authenticity. Young Mark Critch also definitely has an affinity for Shatner-esque histrionics. Captain Benjamin Sisko is a strong runner-up, but in Star Trek, “Captain” means “Kirk” first and foremost.

Wild Cards, on CW

In It Takes a Thief, Robert Wagner was a cat-burglar hired by the U.S. government to fight crime. That show was from the 1960s, but the apparently the Vancouver police are just catching up with it. Frankly, they are not thrilled to take on con artist Max Mitchell as a “consultant,” but that’s politics. “Disgraced” former detective Cole Ellis is the one forced to partner up with her in creator Michael Konyves’s Wild Cards, which premieres Wednesday on CW.

Mitchell was impersonating the owner of a safety-deposit box when she was collared, but since the force was preoccupied with the “Infinity Thief,” Ellis, a demoted boat patrol officer, was called in to book her. While waiting to be processed, she overhears a briefing regarding the Infinity Burglar, who has been targeting the mayor’s biggest donors.

In the spirit of “it takes a thief,” Mitchell volunteers her services to catch the Infinity Thief, in exchange for her freedom. Of course, that is not happening, but the hapless Ellis still gets caught up in her amateur sleuthing. When they uncover the investigation’s first lead, the politically canny commissioner semi-officially assigns them to the case, with vague promises of reinstatement and leniency if they get further results.

Naturally, they have trust issues, but Ellis grudgingly admits Mitchell has insight into this crime. In fact, she knows the only fence who can handle the readily identifiable pieces they are looking for. Not surprisingly, he is “Caviar Stan,” a Russian with diplomatic immunity. Give Canadian television a point for being willing to cast regime-friendly Russians as bad guys. To get close to him, they will need an invite to his private poker game. Mitchell’s dad George Graham can arrange that, even though the legendary crook is currently behind bars. Clearly, he will regularly provide criminal insight for their investigations, but he also has his own agenda.

The first two episodes provided for review are competent light-comedy procedurals, like a somewhat less noir Remington Steele. However, the brief lip-service to wokeness introduced in episode two, “Show Me the Murder,” by the unfairly arrested prime suspect, will alienate the show’s target demo. The regular viewers for Wild Cards will be older than me, so Mitchell’s praise for Angela Lansbury in Murder She Wrote is far more on target.

The pilot, “The Infinity Thief,’ is the better episode of the two, because the Russian angle provides a greater sense of danger and the murder involving twin art dealers taps into classic mystery archetypes. “Show Me the Money” follows a fairly routine investigation of a sports agent’s murder. Since this is Canada, presumably, most of his clients are hockey players and professional curlers, but an MMA star plays a pivotal role in the drama.

On the plus side, Vanessa Morgan and Giacomo Gianniotti already start to develop some decent bickering-bantering ambiguously romantic chemistry in the second episode. She plays up Mitchell’s flamboyance without getting annoying, while Gianniotti is so earnest as Ellis, viewers will respect his integrity, even though we can tell it will make him the butt of endless jokes in future episodes.

I Am Paul Walker, on CW

He could have had a career much like Steve McQueen’s had he lived longer. (especially given their affinity for cars). Yet, you cannot really compare him to James Dean , because he had many more films, but none of them will be remembered as a Giant-level classics. However, he was the face of the biggest original film franchise of the 21^st Century, so far. His death hit fans hard, because the Fast and Furious movies are all about “family,” so he makes a fitting subject for Adrian Buitenhuis’s documentary profile, I Am Paul Walker, which premieres Saturday on CW.

Walker was blessed with movie star looks that blossomed as he grew up as a surfer and athlete in California. Buitenhuis and company largely gloss over his Mormon upbringing, but they clearly establish the “family values” he embraced all his life. Indeed, probably 70% of the interview participants are members of the actual Walker family. We also hear extensively from Tyrese Gibson, part of his Fast family, who credits Walker for his return to the franchise.

Unlike what Buitenhuis had to work with for Burt Reynolds, Walker’s filmography does not offer a wealth of touchstone films beyond the Fast and Furious franchise. However, he talks at length with Rob Cohen, who directed Walker in The Skulls, which was something of a dramatic breakout for him and the original Fast and the Furious, which was a surprise monster hit at the time. Nobody mentions Takers, not even in passing, and his weird but amusing comedic turn in Pawn Shop Chronicles is maybe unfairly overlooked.

However, we get a very good sense of Walker as a family man and a philanthropically inclined private citizen. He was clearly devoted to the daughter he had with his longtime girlfriend, even though it is clear from the awkward context their relationship was a stormy one.

I Am Burt Reynolds, on CW

You do not get to be the biggest movie star of all time if people don’t like you. In his prime, everyone felt a friendly connection to Burt Reynolds, because he seemed like such a fun guy. That was also reflected in his movies—perhaps a little too much. He made a lot of bad ones, but it is sad to think we won’t have any new Burt Reynolds movies ever again. The “last movie star’s” personal and career ups and downs are chronicled in Adrian Buitenhuis’s I Am Burt Reynolds, which premieres Saturday on CW.

If it were not for a career-ending injury, this documentary might have been on ESPN instead. Reynolds assumed football would make him a star. Instead, a drama teaching cast him in a play. That landed him stage work in New York, which led to television and eventually films.

Even at the start, Reynolds’ filmography was what you might describe as inconsistent, but there were always bright spots. Buitenhuis and company spend a good deal of time on John Boorman’s Deliverance, which was the film that made him a star. If Reynolds had accepted more roles like that, his career might more resembled that of Jon Voight, who discusses the film and Reynolds in great detail. The film also calls out the grossly underrated Sharky’s Machine as an example of Reynolds’s talent as a director. Had he pursued more such opportunities, his career might have somewhat parallelled that of Clint Eastwood. Instead, Reynolds opted to continue being the biggest movie star of all time and the #1 box office draw in the late 1970s and early 1980s.

Some of those movies are still pretty bad, but some, like Hal Needham’s Smoky and the Bandit, remain action-comedy classics. With good reason, Needham, Reynolds’ friend and fellow-stuntman-turned director plays an important role in I Am Burt Reynolds (previously, their friendship was the subject of the terrific doc, The Bandit). Arguably, his loyalty to Needham worked out relatively okay for Reynolds, but evidently others amused the actor’s generosity. Of course, he had his share of tabloid-fodder relationships. Buitenhuis does not even address his romance with Dinah Shore, instead focusing on Sally Field and to a greater extent Loni Anderson, especially their lavish wedding and acrimonious divorce.

Everyone Else Burns, on CW

Judge not, lest you be judged—unless you’re judging Evangelicals, in which case, go ahead and judge away. That could be the unofficial motto of the CW’s latest British sitcom import. The Lewis family belongs to a very strict church, so boy, do they ever get mocked for it in creators Dillon Mapletoft & Oliver Taylor’s Everyone Else Burns, which premieres Thursday on the CW.

David Lewis belongs to the Order of the Holy Rod, so his family does too, whether they like it or not. The strict church expels members for drinking coffee, but even they think he is a total pill. Their teen daughter Rachel is a brilliant student, but her parents are dead-set against her attending university, because they believe it will be a cesspool of evil, an opinion that probably sounded ludicrously deranged to the writers two weeks ago, before campus started protesting in solidarity with terrorism. Now, maybe somewhat less so.

Regardless, his wife Fiona yearns for some kind of life outside the house and more to the point, away from him. She is not close to the neighbor Melissa, but the recent divorcee is still willing to help her, out of disdain for her David. Their young son Joshua is a true believer, to a psychotic degree, who gleefully envisions his father suffering the torments of Hell. Like everyone else in the congregation, the young brat prefers the company of Lewis’s rival in the upcoming Elder selection, Andrew, who is the likable, caring exception to the generally venomous portrayal of Evangelicals throughout the first two episodes.

The Spencer Sisters, on CW

A lot of mystery novelists probably think they could be the next Jessica Fletcher. Of course, it is not like she ever had to solve any particularly complex mysteries. Each episode basically had three guest stars: a cop, the daughter of an old friend, and some dude acting squirrely. Regardless, Darby Spencer has little patience for her novelist mother Victoria’s drama, but she still solves cases with her, because she doesn’t have anything better to do in creator Alan McCullough’s The Spencer Sisters, which premieres tomorrow on the CW.

Sometimes, flatterers say Victoria and Darby Spencer look like sisters. The mother loves it, but it makes the daughter wince. The daughter-sister was trying to pursue a career as a Toronto cop, like her deceased father, but she quits in frustration at the sexism and incompetence of senior detectives. She also breaks up with her cheating crypto-trading boyfriend, forcing her to temporarily crash with mom.

Mother Victoria is stressing everyone out over her latest book launch, because sales have been slipping. Of course, Darby is annoyed to be there, but it offers her a chance to catch up with her old friend, Kaia Zhang, who will become their first client in the pilot, “The Scholar’s Snafu.” Poor Zhang has been unfairly accused of plagiarism, because her thesis turned up on a site of frequently re-purposed academic papers. However, the posted paper happens to be an earlier draft, not reflecting her recent revisions.

McCullough and co-writer Jason Ip are clearly more focused on the mother-daughter relationship dynamic than intricately plotted mysteries. However, this episode shines a light on corruption in academia, which most network programs are reluctant to address. Jennifer Hui is reasonable credible as the confused and alarmed Zhang, so we can almost believe she would desperate enough to ask the squabbling Spencers for help.

The second episode is a legit murder case, ostensibly being investigated by the Ontario suburb’s new Lestrade-like detective, so naturally Victoria Spencer wants to step in. She sees crime-solving as a way to heal her strained relationship with her daughter. Darby is not so sure, but she still doesn’t have any better offers. Apparently, Marlina Briggs’ boy-toy fiancé was killed with an experimental drug her own company developed, but at least the episode is not as anti-Big Pharma as you might expect. It isn’t very complicated either. (Of course, it does not help that each episode must devote substantial time for Darby Spencer to seek the sage counsel of her gay besties, Zane and Antonio).

The Swarm, on CW

The oceans have always been dangerous. Ships sink. People drown. That was even before something started apparently weaponizing marine life against us. Obviously, the most responsible course of action would be draining the oceans and paving over the sea floors. Presumably, that is the intended message of this new European-produced English-language environmental thriller. Adapted from Frank Schatzing’s door-stopper novel, the eight-episode The Swarm kicks off Tuesday night on the CW.

First the whales started acting strangely homicidal, which is quite puzzling to First Nations cetologist Leon Atawak. Then an outbreak tears through France, which virologist Dr. Cecile Roche traces back to mutated lobsters. Dr. Sigur Johanson, reluctantly consulting for a Scandinavian energy corporation, finds a similar mutation in sea worms right in a trench they were prospecting. It turns out those little creepy crawlers can burrow at a remarkably fast clip—so much so, they could destabilize continents.

Grad student Charlie Wagner also identifies strange oceanic hotspots that seem to correspond to areas of unexplained marine phenomenon, including the sinking of the research vessel her best friend was assigned to. Eventually, these globally scattered scientists (not including any Americans) will discover strange signals that possibly tie all these events together. Unfortunately, the world’s bureaucrats are not ready to listen to them. They are too busy with the armies of mutant crabs over-running coastal populations. At least there is a Japanese shipping tycoon who has been monitoring their findings.

Beyond the environmental finger-wagging, the series’s greatest drawback is the shallow characterization. Each major character gets one really nice, emotionally resonant scene, but they are all spread out over eight episodes. Mostly, we watch Johanson, Wagner, Atawak, and Roche point at computer screens and complain about how nobody listens to them. Meanwhile, there is a cameo from Dr. Fauci admitting his agency funded a Chinese study that created aggressive mutant crabs and lobsters, purely for research purposes, but that is totally coincidental to the current outbreaks. Okay, just kidding.

This was clearly an expensive production (reportedly, it is the biggest budgeted German TV production ever), featuring a lot of decent looking underwater cinematography, maritime disasters, and mollusks behaving badly. Yet, ironically, it largely neglects the human element.

Run the Burbs, on CW

If you can’t laugh at family, who can you laugh at? Of course, they still have to be funny. The Phams are very hit-or-miss when it comes to comedy, but boy do they try hard to bring the yuck-yucks. There is a lot of running around and complaining in their suburban Canadian neighborhood, but each problem is resolved in about twenty-two minutes by the diverse cast in creators Andrew Phung & Scott Townsend’s Run the Burbs, which premieres Monday on the CW.

Run the Burbs is shot in Ontario, but it is based on Phung’s Calgary suburb. Wherever it is, it is definitely Canadian, which is what we are coming to expect from CW shows, especially during the writers and actors strikes. Phung plays Andrew Pham, a stay-at-home dad, who raises his abrasively woke teen daughter Khia and geeky pre-teen son Leo, while his wife Camille makes money doing her “entrepreneurial” thing. Of course, Khia has some sort of trendy alphabet sexuality, so they can avoid the trouble of writing a complex persona for her.

There are times when the writing appears poised to make sharp satirical commentary, but it always backs off at the last minute. For instance, in the pilot episode “Blockbuster,” the neighborhood block-party is in danger of cancellation, by the officious paper-work-obsessed community-association president, but it down-shifts into a cheesy Fast & Furious parody (in which Camille takes on a street-racer for his party permit) rather than seriously skewering the buzzkill that is bureaucracy.

Likewise, “Heatwave” sees Khia accept a mural commission at their favorite bubble tea store, only to squander it with a highly politicized and massively inappropriate monstrosity. It is a great set-up to skewer the woke mentality, but the toothless follow-up mostly consists of some apathetic shrugs.

Son of a Critch, on CW

In Canada, this show is sort of like Everyone Hates Chris or Young Rock. Since comedian Mark Critch is not particularly well-known in America, we can think of it as The Wonder Years with some Rush songs. Coming of age is always hard, especially with an embarrassing family, but young Mark Critch learns nearly everyone has an embarrassing family in Son of a Critch, which premieres Monday on the CW.

The Critch family lives on the outskirts of late-1980’s St. John’s, Newfoundland. His father Mike (played by grown-up Mark Critch, who also narrates, like Daniel Stern on The Wonder Years) is a gung-ho reporter for the local radio station and his somewhat high-strung mother Mary boils all their food. Perhaps his moody teen brother Mike Jr. is his least embarrassing family member. However, sharing a bedroom with his crotchety grandfather Peter (“Pops”) is definitely way up there, even though he is probably closer to Pops than his parents or brother. Attending wakes to grade the food is one of their favorite things to do together.

Regardless, the best parts of Critch happen at the Catholic junior high school young Mark is forced to attend. To say the Dean Martin-listening Critch is socially awkward is an understatement, but he manages to befriend Ritchie Perez, the son of successful Filipino doctors. Unfortunately, he is quickly bullied by “Fox,” one of three thuggish red-haired siblings all known by their surname. She also has a massive crush on Critch, which he reciprocates, even though he will not admit it.

Based on the first four episodes, young Critch’s relationships with Perez and Fox are the best things going for the series. His rapport with grouchy grandpa is also very likable, especially since the old dude is played by the legendary Malcolm McDowell (try to forget how many times we have seen him naked in films like A Clockwork Orange and Cat People). Listening to him kvetch with Benjamin Evan Ainsworth, the young Mark Critch, is pretty amusing, particularly in the funeral-focused second episode, “Lordy, Lordy, Look Who’s Dead.”

The ”Pilot” episode truly feels like a pilot, since it is literally Critch’s first day of school. Still, the third act shows some of the chemistry developing between Ainsworth and Sophia Powers and Mark Ezekiel Rivera as Fox and Perez. That is where the charm and humor of the third and fourth episodes (“Cello, I Must Be Going” and “Cucumber Slumber”) come from. That said, the digs at Catholic school life and the portrayal of the nuns are mostly cliched and derivative material.