Tribeca ’17: Sweet Virginia

Perhaps it is time to rethink your dream of becoming a motelier in small town Alaska. It turns out that life is not all caviar and champagne. This is especially true for a nerve-damaged former rodeo star when a triple homicide stuns his sleepy burg. The killer happens to be sleeping in Sam Rossi’s sheets, so it is almost inevitable he will strike again uncomfortably close to home in Jamie M. Dagg’s Sweet Virginia, which screens during the 2017 Tribeca Film Festival.

Ironically, the Virginia-born hitman calling himself Elwood recognizes fellow Virginian Rossi from his rodeo days. You could say he is in town on business. Elwood is responsible for killing three men playing their regular late night poker game at Tom Barrett’s restaurant. He had only been contracted by Lila McCabe to kill her abusive, good-for-nothing husband, but Elwood does not like to wait. Unfortunately, he will have to, if he wants to collect his money.

As it turns out, her loving hubby did not reveal their real financial situation to McCabe. It’s not pretty. Neither is the state of her conscience, knowing that two other men died because of her. Bernadette Barrett is also in a strange emotional place. She is truly sorry her husband died, but her growing feelings for Rossi, with whom she has been secretly carrying on an affair, remain undiminished. As the Widows Barrett and McCabe console each other, Elwood grows restive, which bodes ill for the town.

Sweet Virginia (a holdover title from earlier drafts set in rural VA, which really doesn’t make much sense anymore) is being billed as a “neo-western,” which is becoming a catch-all label for small town anxiety. Despite a few killings, it is worlds removed from Hell or High Water. The best part of Sweet VA is the relationship between Rossi and Barrett, two people wounded by life, who have found a bit of respite together. Unfortunately, most of the stuff around them plays out like warmed-over Fargo, except at a fraction of the pace.

Yet, to his credit, Dagg (who previously helmed the not-bad River) uncorks some tense scenes that make us sit up and suddenly start to care again. The opening murder scene is deceptively tense and a later home-invasion sequence is a real hum-dinger. In contrast, the unconvincing bromance that develops agonizingly slowly between Rossi and Elwood is mostly just a snooze.

John Bernthal and Rosemarie DeWitt are terrific as Rossi and Barrett. In contrast, Christopher Abbott seems to be trying to channel Shia LaBeouf as Elwood, which is a dubious strategy. Relying on little makeup, the glammed down Imogen Poots is still almost unrecognizable as McCabe, but she gets surprisingly little screen time, given her comparative prominence.

There is a lot of talent in this film, including Jessica Lee Gagné’s stylish cinematography. By process of elimination, we come to suspect the fundamental problem is the China Brothers’ inert screenplay. Frustratingly flawed, Sweet Virginia screens again tonight (4/23), Tuesday (4/25), and Thursday (4/27), as part of this year’s Tribeca Film Festival.

Sugar Mountain: A Simple Plan for Simpletons

We think of Alaska as a wild frontier that lags years behind the current trends sweeping the lower forty-eight, but there have been as many as ten reality shows simultaneously filming in the land of the midnight sun. With programs like Deadliest Catch, Alaska State Troopers, and Bering Sea Gold available, how much media interest could a lost hiker’s story generate? Admittedly, some sibling rivalry and sexual jealousy could spice it up a little, but as hoaxes go, this one seems awfully speculative. It is also an incredibly stupid idea for the irresponsible West sibling to pretend to be lost in the wild, but brains are pretty scarce in Richard Gray’s Sugar Mountain (trailer here), which opens today in New York.

After the death of their sainted mother, Miles and Liam West have run the family tour boat business into the ground. With the repossessed boat in dry dock, the younger Liam eventually agrees to his brother’s scheme. Miles will hole up in a pre-supplied shelter, eventually coming down after a week or so, to the relief of an eager media. To make it more interesting, they will stage his disappearance to make it suspiciously follow a very public spat, in which Miles will accuse Liam of having eyes for his girlfriend Lauren Huxley, the daughter of the local sheriff, which maybe isn’t so unlikely a coincidence in a tiny Alaskan town.

Of course, the younger West really has been carrying a torch for Huxley. Inevitably, the two co-conspirators will become awkwardly close as the endure the media scrutiny together. The pressure starts to rise when they realize that fool Miles never made it to his shelter. To make matters worse, recently released ex-con Joe Bright comes around looking to collect Miles’ gambling debts.

If you have seen a film with more stupid decisions than Sugar Mountain, than Dude, I really feel for you. Frankly, Abe Pogos’s ridiculous script causes so much face-palming, it is hard to actually watch the movie—not that there’s much there to miss. Nothing makes any sense, starting with Liam’s mopey infatuation with Huxley when the kind-hearted (and just-as-attractive-or-more) girl from the general store is clearly interested in him. Any guy growing up in Alaska would know better than squandering such opportunities, but Gray is Australian, so whatever.

Frankly, the only times Sugar is remotely entertaining are Jason Momoa’s periodic pop-ins to beat the snot out of everyone as Bright. Sadly, most of the film is dominated by the excruciating Cain and Abel dynamics and the love triangle, which is ultimately resolved in an absolutely risible fashion.

Drew Roy, Shane Coffey, and Haley Webb certainly make the three central characters look and sound like idiots, which could be quite fine acting, but it doesn’t give us much to work with. Arguably, it is even more depressing to watch Cary Elwes stumble around as the schlubby Sheriff Huxley. Forget The Princess Bride, this will even depress Saw fans. Only Hawaii’s Momoa seems to glide through unscathed, perhaps feeling that 1959 non-contiguous kinship.

Regardless, this film is just a mess that would try anyone’s patience. Gray’s previous film, The Lookalike was not spectacular, but it had a basic level of competency and managed to be interesting in patches. So, what happened here? Not recommended, Sugar Mountain opens today (12/9) in New York, at the Cinema Village.