SF Indie Fest ’13: The Legend of Kaspar Hauser

Since the early Nineteenth Century, the odd tale of Kaspar Hauser has stirred controversy and skepticism.  The latest film (somewhat) inspired by the sad strange Bavarian wild child is likely to generate similar disbelief.  Those who enjoy historical costume dramas will be deeply disappointed, but fans of Vincent Gallo get a double fix with Davide Manuli’s The Legend of Kaspar Hauser (trailer here), which screens during the 2013 San Francisco Independent Film Festival.

After a long mysterious absence, Kaspar Hauser washes up on a deserted Sardinian beach.  The local Sheriff is convinced the young man is indeed heir to the island’s throne.  After all, he has his name tattooed across his chest.  Others, like the local Priest, consider him a holy fool.  However, the ruling Duchess does not think much of Hauser at all.

Hauser never says much, but he is constantly getting down to the music apparently coming out of the headphones that he always wears but never has connected to anything.  Eventually, the Sheriff teaches him a profession: dj-ing, surely a high demand trade on a nearly barren isle.  There are also UFOs that briefly show up.

Do not try to make too much sense of Legend.  It would be a fruitless exercise.  The only reason to watch the film is to see Gallo do his thing as the English speaking Sheriff and his Italian speaking nemesis, the Pusher.  He improvises, chews the scenery, and boogies down with wild abandon.  Nonetheless, he cannot disguise the thinness of the concept he is trying to punch up.

Tarek Ben Abdallah’s black-and-white cinematography is quite striking, as is Elisa Sednaoui as the Clairvoyant, one of apparently seven residents of the island.  Unfortunately, her scenes are essentially extended non sequiturs.  On the plus side, a case could be made Silvia Calderoni is rather effective as Hauser, since it takes a while for those not forewarned to realize she is a woman playing a manchild’s role.

Fans of electronica might dig Vitalic’s original soundtrack, but it is hard to believe it would constitute sufficient entertainment for most movie patrons.  Manuli offers up some clever gags here and three, like “priest” emblazoned on the back of “the Priest’s” cassock” in Judas Priest typography, but basically, Legend just gives you Gallo X 2 in black-and-white. 

Regardless, Legend is sure to attract a cult audience, who will probably guffaw loudly through both showings to assure themselves they are really enjoying it.  Recommended for Gallo fanatics (who are not likely to have many chances to see it), but not the rest of us mere mortals, The Legend of Kaspar Hauser screens this Friday (2/8) and the following Monday (2/11) at the Roxie Theatre as part of this year’s SF Indie Fest.

2 Days in New York: This is Why People Hate The City

At least it is not a three day weekend.  However, a handful of aging smug hipsters can make forty-eight hours feel like a month of Mondays.  Viewers should be forewarned, the fake banter flies fast and furious in writer-director-star Julie Delpy’s 2 Days in New York (trailer here), which opens tomorrow in New York.

Delpy’s Marion has dumped Jack from 2 Days in Paris and moved to New York, where she took up with Mingus, a professional Obama apologist on a hip hop radio station.  It must have been because of his cool name, rather than his self-absorbed personality.  Regardless, they seem to be happy raising their kids together, until her daft father Jeannot, nymphomaniac sister Rose, and Rose’s stoner ex-boyfriend Manu pay a visit.  Each has their own aggressively irritating foibles guaranteed to stretch Marion’s relationship with Mingus to its snapping point.  Adding further stress, Marion’s gallery show is fast approaching, where she is scheduled to sell her soul as an exercise in performance art at the opening.

Have you ever been stuck in a queue behind an annoying couple that takes advantage of their captive audience to loudly “perform” their cleverest repartee?  2 Days in New York is like ninety-one minutes of that sort of material.  There are precisely two very funny bits, because they each contain more than a kernel of truth.  In one scene, Marion’s family scandalizes Mingus’s friends when they proclaim they like Obama because he is a socialist.  Later, in a truly inspired sequence, Marion meets with Vincent Gallo (playing himself), who bought her soul and is ready to take possession.  It is the sort of thing one can see Gallo doing, which is why it is so hilarious.  It is not enough to justify a ticket though, especially here in the City.

2 Days proves simply acting neurotic does not automatically make you funny—just irksome.  As Mingus, Chris Rock displays no edge whatsoever.  It is an embarrassing screen turn, largely defined by his star-struck hero-worship for the current Oval Office occupier.  Likewise, Delpy’s hot mess shtick gets old quick.  2 Days might have actually worked on a subversive level, if the French invaders were interesting enough to root for, but they are not.  Frankly, even Jeannot, played by Delpy’s real life father Albert, is little more than a grouchy grandpa run amok.

2 Days could be considered an Olympic showdown, in which Upper Westsiders compete against the French for the gold medal in neuroses.  Of course, Vincent Gallo wins anyway, by virtue of his vastly superior coolness.  Despite the occasional clever moment, 2 Days in New York is not recommended when it open tomorrow (8/10) in New York at the Lincoln Plaza and Angelika Film Center.