Finally,
someone has made the EastEnders episode
you always wanted to see. The title
pretty much tells you everything you need to know about Matthias Hoene’s Cockneys vs. Zombies (trailer here), which opens this
Friday in New York.
The
zombie apocalypse comes at a rather opportune time for the McGuire
brothers. Their plan to hold up a bank
to save their crotchety grandfather’s old folks home has deteriorated into a
hostage crisis. Against her better
judgment, their cousin Katy came along to keep them out of trouble. Unfortunately, there is no way to compensate
for the wildly unstable Mental Mickey.
However, the zombie hordes quite obligingly clear out all the coppers
dug-in outside. Of course, this leads to
other problems. Now the McGuires and a handful
of hostages and accomplices must race to the Bow Bells Care Home to save
Grandpa and his cronies.
To
briefly recap, you have your zombies and you have your cockneys scrambling
about, shooting them in the head. All
clear? C vs. Z is the sort of film that probably started with the high
concept title, perhaps the result of a particularly inspiring pub crawl. However, unlike other horror movie mash-ups, Hoene
maintains a consistently high energy level and James Moran’s screenplay
delivers the right mix of gory laughs and meathead action.
But
wait there’s more, including Honor Blackman, a.k.a. Pussy Galore, blasting
zombies back to the Stone Age. In fact, it’s
an unusually accomplished cast, including the late, great Richard Briers
(recognizable from the Britcom The Good
Life and Branagh’s Shakespearean films) with a machine gun strapped to his
walker. Lovejoy’s Dudley Sutton also gets in on the act, but Alan Ford (a
Guy Ritchie regular) really steals the biscuit as ornery old Ray “Don’t Call Me
Grandpa” McGuire.
In
all fairness, Rasmus Hardiker and Harry Treadaway (the other Treadaway twin)
are solid enough as the bickering McGuire brothers, but they are somewhat
overshadowed by the colorful supporting cast and all the gleeful mayhem. Yet, Michelle Ryan (a former EastEnders cast member) makes a
considerably stronger impression, earning action props as sharp-shooting cousin
Katy.