The
French are so sophisticated about love and sex. Wannabe literary hipsters are
so not. Yet, for reasons bafflingly obscure, a retired French model picks an
aspiring New Yorker short story
writer for her evening dalliances. They can only meet for two hours in the
early evening because according to French tradition that is the time when
husbands and wives might be indisposed without arousing suspicion. Of course,
her unlikely lover has trouble with their arrangement because he is so
hopelessly bourgeoisie. There is culture clash on the Upper Eastside in Victor
Levin’s 5 to 7 (trailer here), which opens this
Friday in New York.
It
is pretty clear from his constant bittersweet narration, if Brian Bloom ever
made it as writer, it is because he had his heart ripped out and stomped on.
The glamorous Arielle looks like the perfect woman to do it. Much to Bloom
shock (and the audience’s disbelief), the slightly older French woman is
receptive when he awkwardly approaches he outside the St. Regis. She rather
enjoys his earnest geekiness and recommends he meet her again the following
week at the same time and place. That would be after five, of course. She makes
no secret of her marriage, but stresses they must follow the rules.
We
eventually learn Bloom was raised Jewish, but he is more uptight about this sort
of thing than a repressed Protestant with body issues. Just having some
ships-in-the-night fun is beyond him, but Arielle’s charm and beauty have him
bewitched. She even introduces him to her gracious editor at FSG (you won’t
find any Harlequin drones at their shindigs). Although it is unfathomable for
the audience, everyone believes in Bloom’s potential, but he jeopardizes
everything by falling in love with Arielle.
On
the one hand, Levin captures a vivid sense of why New York is such an alluring city
in the first place. When he goes for pure elegance and ambiance, 5 to 7 is rather entertaining like a one
night assignation, heavy on champagne and light on consequences. Unfortunately,
Bloom’s narration will have viewers pulling their hair out and his dialogue
often sounds like it was written with a laugh track in mind. As it happens,
Levin has extensive television credits with shows like Mad About You and Dream On.
According
to imdb, less than ten years separate co-leads Anton Yelchin and Bérénice
Marlohe, but he looks about fourteen years old and she looks incredible. James
Bond had good reason to be upset when Javier Bardem killed her character in Skyfall. She is trés charmant and makes
her scenes with Yelchin work, despite the glib, sitcommy banter he is stuck
with. As the suave Valéry, Lambert Wilson makes Charles Boyer look like Walter
Brennan, but he is also shockingly compelling when defending the rules and
rituals required to keep up appearances. However, when Glenn Close and Frank
Langella show up as Bloom’s bickering parents, we find ourselves expecting the
laugh track to kick in again.
