There
were never any killer crocodiles in Upstate New York—only a few mutant alligators
in the City sewers. For the most part, the Lake
Placid franchise has been set around the fictional Black Lake, Maine. The
latest Syfy-produced sequel heads to points unknown, way off the grid, where
the Meg-like crocs all began. Wherever it is, it should have stayed off the
grid. Hardcore fans will be disappointed there are no “Bickermans” this time around,
but causal viewers will also have plenty of reason to feel let down when
Darrell Roodt’s Lake Placid: Legacy (trailer here) releases today on
DVD.
In
a bit of a departure from previous films, nobody will care if any or hopefully all
of these characters die. That is because we are about to follow a gang of
eco-terrorists and the online “journalist” doing their PR, as they attempt to
plant their Black Flag in a remote, mysteriously chained off lakefront
facility. They claim they will expose the truth, but it turns out limiting
access to the place was really the more responsible thing to do. Alas, by the
time they figure that out, they are running for their lives from a giant crocodile
with prehistoric DNA spliced into his genetic code.
Why
would the Big Pharma company that closed up the joint do something crazy like
that in the first place? Frankly, Jonathan Walker’s screenplay has a real hard
time explaining why they would do such a thing. Henderson, the undercover
corporate stooge offers up some double-talk about potential medicine from their
stem-cells, but seriously, how many life-saving drugs have been developed from
mutant monster stem lines? Eventually, the movie just gives up, wailing “drug
companies just do bad things.” Oh, you mean they’re like the government?
Despite
going to SyFy and direct-to-DVD distribution with the second film, the Lake Placid films have featured some
interesting genre actors, like Robert Englund, Michael Ironside, Yancey Butler,
and Cloris Leachman. Unfortunately, all Legacy
has is Joe Pantoliano in what amounts to an extended cameo as Henderson. He
doesn’t really get a chance to build up that nervous energy he is known for, probably
because he was trying to get out of there as soon as possible.
The
featured cast is almost as dull as the lifeless story. Previous Lake Placid films have had a bit of
humor, but this is a mirthless affair. Craig Stein’s Spencer is probably meant
to be comic relief, but his loud-mouthed complaining is a painful chore to sit
through.
