Exit Protocol, Starring Dolph Lundgren & Michael Jai White

When your job is assassinating assassins, you probably aren’t contributing much to your 401K. Yet, Sam Hayden is somehow surprised when his boss takes out a contract on him. Nevertheless, he still wants to complete his latest job, retired assassin Charles Managold, even though they sometimes must cooperate to survive the other hit squads. It is awkward, but Hayden and Managold work together better than Cuomo and Sliwa in Shane Dax Taylor’s Exit Protocol, which releases this Friday in theaters and on VOD.

Usually, Hayden’s marks have it coming, maybe even the ones that trouble his conscience. Managold was one of the worst, until he first found Danique Kellar and then found God. Unfortunately, Hayden has now found them, but the notorious Managold’s skills are as good as advertised. Hayden is better prepared for his second attempt, until his colleagues Isaac Florentine and “Wicked” show up, guns blazing, in his general direction.

Despite still hoping to complete his contract, Hayden forges an uneasy alliance with Managold. It is probably because of the visions he sees of his late girlfriend, Nona Messenger. Her scenes are weirdly clumsy. At first, Taylor presents her as if she were of the flesh, but he soon reveals her “ghostly” status shortly thereafter. Perversely, almost every subsequent appearance tries to shock us with another revelation regarding her backstory, but it is all very silly and hopelessly telegraphed. Frankly, the only thing Messenger’s character manages to accomplish is reminding viewers of the vast superiority of The Sixth Sense.

Nevertheless, Dolph Lundgren and Michael Jai White continue to be two of the most reliable stars of VOD action. Frankly, Lundgren shows some acting chops as Managold, especially in his scene discussing his conversion. In the case of White (playing Florentine), his delivery manages to wring some dry humor out of screenwriter Chad Law’s pedestrian dialogue. He and Lundgren maintain their instant credibility administering beatdowns.

Neil Marshall’s Duchess

Rarely have movie femme fatales been as foul-mouthed Scarlett Monaghan, but to be fair, the Hays Code never let Lana Turner or Rita Hayworth have much opportunity to cuss out the men they manipulated. Monaghan is also a particularly fatal fatale, thanks to her boxing skills. Unfortunately, she has a knack for getting mixed up with the wrong guys, but at least Robert McNaughton treats her right, while he is alive. When he is betrayed, she starts gunning for revenge in Neil Marshall’s Duchess, which releases Friday on digital and on-demand.

Monaghan caught McNaughton’s eye while picking pockets for her “Fagin.” When he beat her, she fought back, but McNaughton finished him. After that, she was his fulltime lover, arm candy, and confidante. Danny Oswald and Billy Baraka, McNaughton’s partners from his merc days, also got along with her dubbing her “Duchess.”

Their new business is dangerous, but extremely lucrative. They smuggle diamonds, but not “blood diamonds,” except they’re all blood diamonds. Before long, they are all double-crossed by Tom Sullivan, another old friend, who wasn’t as old and clearly isn’t as friendly. Sullivan’s goons murder McNaughton, but Monaghan survives through a fluke. Together with Oswald and Baraka, Monaghan hatches a plan to avenge her lover and take back what is theirs.

By far, Duchess is the best film Marshall has made with his fiancée (or whatever) Charlotte Kirk, for many reasons. First and foremost, the brassy Monaghan is the first starring role that truly suits her. Watching her playing an impeccably coifed and made-up peasant in The Reckoning was just ridiculous. This time around, she actually earns intentional laughs as the trash-talking Monaghan.

The Reckoning, on Shudder

For obvious reasons, the witch hunts of the 17^th and early 18^th Centuries have been fertile ground for horror films, but if they include any supernatural elements, they sort of inadvertently justify the barbarism they seek to condemn. Director Neil Marshall and his lead actress-co-writer Charlotte Kirk try to get around this dilemma by having their heroine tormented by both the witch-hunter and the Devil. They spare her nothing and heavily lay on their anti-Church biases throughout The Reckoning, which premieres this Thursday on Shudder.

The Great Plague has ravaged London and has started appearing in the provinces where Grace Haverstock (a late 1600’s peasant, who always looks like she just stepped out of the makeup chair at her local MAC store) lives with her husband Joseph and their infant daughter Abbie. Tragically, Joseph contracts the plague while selling his grain in town (thanks to a little switcheroo the Squire plays with his ale mug). Of course, the entitled landlord wants Haverstock to pay the rent through sex, so when she violently spurns him, he has her accused of witchcraft. Judge Moorcroft, the notorious witch-finder is sent for, but his brutal tactics will not leave much for the Squire’s pleasure.

When not being tortured at court, Haverstock is menaced by the Devil and haunted by visions of her husband and mother, who pled guilty to witchcraft to save her daughter from the wrath of Moorcroft. Obviously, Marshall and company are using the witch hunts to make a statement on contemporary #metoo-era gender politics, but all their powerful male characters are so stupid, it is hard to see how they manage to walk twenty feet without falling down, let alone preserve their privileged patriarchy.