Speak
& Spells must have trouble with the word subtle, because the Oodie Brothers
are clearly not familiar with it. It
doesn’t seem to mean much to director-co-writer Barry Battles either, but he
certainly knows his Skynyrd and how to stage an over-the-top shootout. Viewers are in store for plenty of redneck
exploitation action when Battles’ The
Baytown Outlaws (trailer
here) opens
this Friday in New York.
The
Oodies are good at killing. Of course,
it helps not having to worry about getting collared. They are the secret weapon of Sheriff Henry Millard,
who turns the boys on loose on every other deadbeat criminal in his county,
thereby keeping the crime rate impressively low. As the film opens, they have made a minor mistake,
wiping out the wrong house full of thugs.
It is nothing Millard cannot cover-up, but there is a witness. Duly impressed, Celeste Martin and her Daisy
Dukes hire the Oodie Brother to whack her gangster ex-husband Carlos Lyman and
safely return her godson, Rob. Complications
and bodies ensue.
It
turns out Rob is basically a human bearer bond.
Presumably developmentally disabled and confined to a wheelchair, Rob
will soon inherit a sizable trust fund, which will be controlled by his
guardian. He is more than the Oodies
bargained for. Nonetheless, they quickly
warm to the lad in scenes that play like the Sons of Anarchy version of Savannah
Smiles. Have no fear, sentimentality
is not Baytown’s priority. Frankly, one gets the feeling the set erupted
in laughter as soon as Battles yelled cut on the film’s big emotional scenes.
Baytown really bares
its soul when five suggestively clad biker assassin babes tangle with the Oodies. Ranging somewhere between a Southern-fried
indie and an outright midnight movie, Battles goes for defiantly violent laughs
and gets almost as many as Django Unchained in about half the time.
This
is no classic, but everyone is game, particularly Billy Bob Thornton, obviously
enjoying every word of Lyman’s shamelessly politically incorrect dialogue. Although he never speaks a syllable (relying
instead on said Speak & Spell), Daniel Cudmore (Colossus in the X-Men franchise) has a real physical
presence as Lincoln Oodie. Clayne
Crawford and Travis Fimmel also exhibit admirable energy as Brick and McQueen
Oodie, respectively (but sometimes it is rather hard to tell them apart). Eva Longoria does not have much to do beyond
wear her short shorts and shoot a few guns, but Martin is still some of her
best screen work, maybe ever.
