It
is time for some sea stories for fans of hip, violent midnight movies, in the
Tarantino tradition. There will be a sly narrator and plenty of booze. There
will also be all kinds of sexual jealousy, class envy, and good old-fashioned
bad attitudes. The pleasure craft “Naughty Buoy” will be like a homicidal
version of the S.S. Minnow in Rob Grant’s Harpoon, which launches today
on VOD.
Poor,
unloved Jonah really does not like his best bud Richie very much, but he still
hangs out with the wealthy lout, just to partake in his privileged life-style. He
is also probably carrying a torch for Richie’s girlfriend Sasha, who mostly
stays with him for the same reason. Richie has anger management issues, as we
can plainly see in the opening scenes. To make up for his violent rage, Richie
offers to whisk them off on a day trip in the Naughty Buoy. Obviously, he
sounds like the kind of guy you would want to share a tight, confined space
with.
Inevitably,
the same suspicions and resentments will rear their head again, on the open
ocean. Just when violence and murder appear inevitable, the three pseudo-friends
will call a truce when they discover the engine has died and their store of
food and fresh water is minimal. To survive, they will need to work together.
Right, the outlook for that is not so hot.
On
the other hand, their increasingly mounting troubles are quite funny—in a pitch-black
kind of way. There is plenty of edgy (and often blood-splattered) humor here,
but the funniest material comes from Brett Gelman’s ultra-droll narration—arguably
the funniest omniscient voice-overs since Ron Howard’s vintage pre-Netflix Arrested
Development narration.
Fortunately,
Munro Chambers, Emily Tyra, and Christopher Gray are fearlessly and
aggressively unlikable and profoundly unfit for society as Jonah, Sasha, and
Richie. They are compulsively watchable, but nobody will care what happens to
them, so just enjoy the mayhem.
Maybe
the biggest surprise Harpoon has to spring is the intelligence of Grant’s
script (with contributions from Mike Kovac). There is an extended riff on
Richard Parker, both the Poe character and the eerily similar historical cannibalism
victim that really is clever (and rather literate). The dialogue is crisp and
cutting, while the narration is even more so.
We
can probably guess where this is all heading, but it is definitely worth taking
the trip anyway. Based on Harpoon and the decidedly surprising Alive,
Grant is emerging as a genre filmmaker fans need to keep watching. Highly
recommended for everyone who enjoys their horror stripped-down and sarcastic, Harpoon
is now available on VOD platforms, and screens this Friday (10/11) in
Boulder, CO at the Dairy Arts Center.
